Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

When did washing a dog exhaust you very quickly?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Japan’s oldest “human” fossils aren’t human at all, says new study - Glass Almanac

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Islam is definitely a very anti-LGBTQ religion, so why don't liberals ever stage pro-LGBTQ demonstrations at mosques or at the consulates/embassies of Muslim countries?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What do you think of Gen. Waker-uz-Zaman's statement that "the Bangladesh Army will always stand by the people"?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Kyle Busch, Josh Berry go sliding in practice at Nashville - NASCAR.com

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What does K mean in Vietnamese?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I see through liars

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Stretching across 7.6 sextillion miles of space, astronomers crown it the new 'largest structure in the universe' - Earth.com

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

In the TV show Supernatural, why is God portrayed as cruel?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Is something wrong with my discharge? So, when I masturbate, white discharge comes from my vagina, but it's not stretchy, it's pasty. It doesn't smell and I'm not itchy, so I'm sure it's not a yeast infection. Why is it pasty though?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Gigi Hadid, Bradley Cooper, Brad Pitt, and Ines de Ramon’s New York Date Night Had a Dress Code - Vogue

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Steelers Preferred Matthew Stafford, Justin Fields To Aaron Rodgers? - NFL Rumors - ProFootballRumors.com

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I can count

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I actually pay taxes

I have a reading level above third grade

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand how hurricane paths work

I can read

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism